 At one point or another in our lives, I know that each and every one of us has been inspired and led by our life experiences to question our existence by asking this question: “what is my passion and purpose in life?” In Paulo Coelho’s book, “The Alchemist”, he introduces the concept of “personal legend” as the truest path and calling that each of us have in our life, that we have every capacity to actualize. Oprah calls it our “supreme destiny”: this is when where we are living the “fullest, truest, and highest expression of ourselves”. Although there may be different names for it, the essence is the same: it is all about living a path in life that resonates most with your heart and your truth.
Tonight, I went to a workshop. We did an activity where we had to write an acrostic poem for the word BLUEPRINT to write down our own personal manifesto on how to live our own unique blueprint in our every day lives. It was an intuitive, fun and reflective exercise that helped me come up with a clearer understanding on what I believe and what I stand for. Here is mine: B e present in the moment. The past is gone, the future is yet to come. Create beauty. Right here, right now. L ive the highest, truest, brightest version of myself by following my heart, my inner spark. U nderstand that everyone has different perspectives. You can’t control what they see or how they interpret situations, but you can choose to decide what you see in a given situation. Choose love. Always. E mbrace my intuition and always stay true to my intentions. In any given situation, ask yourself, “what is my truest intention?” This is your inner compass. P erspective: the miracle in life to me is whatever situations and people come into my life, I have the choice to shift my perspective. Choose loving thoughts moment to moment, day by day. R eflect: take time to reflect and be honest with yourself. Know that people and situations are there for the purpose of helping you grow and expand your awareness. I ntuition: Trust your intuition. Know that your intuition is the soft voice in your heart, your inner compass and inner wisdom. N ever settle for less than what you deserve in life. Do more of what makes your heart sing and your soul soar. T reat yourself with compassion, care and love. Know that it all begins with self care before we are able to truly share our hearts with others fully. © 2015 Lovisa Fung. All Rights Reserved.
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 “The frivolity of the night began to detach itself away from me-fall away.” ~ Kevin Sessums
This is quite possibly the most liberating and honest way to sum up the relationship I had with you, why I decided to leave and what persuaded me to get back to my humanness, my humanity, the center of my soul and heart’s longing: Walking into the gala, I feel a surge of nervousness, of uncertainty tinged with sadness and intoxicated anticipation. Through the looking glass I stared at myself as I waltzed into the front room to hand over my name. I look around me-the excessive outfits, the air of desperate attention fills my vision with uneasiness as I stared once more at the looking glass: this is not me, this is not me, this is not me.The emptiness of the fraudulent night had just begun and already I am filled with an all-consuming suffocation in my heart. The moment I enter into the gala with you, I immediately needed with such an intense and impatient desire to concoct, douse and fabricate my soul with courage in a glass so as to fit myself into your world of parties, glitter and glamour. Standing beside you and knowing that I don’t belong, I feel as though I am hindering your chances of boasting yourself and shining your ego with others. I felt it and knew it in my heart. As the intensity of this feeling creeps into me, I wash it away gulp by gulp with my courage in a glass. I asked for another glass. And then another. And another. We sat down. The frivolous dinner begins. Everything becomes a blur of counterfeit enjoyment, a circus of glittering hopelessness in my heart. As I drank and ate and played pretend beside you, with each bite and each gulp and each glance at the stage, I begin to disappear more and more into the fictitious night. In the car, with Miss. Ocktoberfest and a roadie-full of others dedicated to the slave of deceitful nights, I along with you, hopped into the car to take over the night. We ended our destination at a bar. Stumbling in, I feel as though the courage in a glass is subsiding, I needed more to sustain, to maintain my pretension for you. We immediately placed another courage in a glass in my delicate, trembling hands. The chatter of nothingness wavers into the stifling air around me creating smoke and mirrors to our fog-filled souls. A sudden, stronger than life realization dawns on me as the pinnacle moment of emptiness flashed before my eyes: sitting there with all of them, staring at the laughing waitresses-turned-glamazons with their endless, pseudo chatter, and men all around me boasting their extravagant egos as they saturate their souls with frenzied, wretched validation…all I wanted to do was to run, run away as fast as I could back to the home of my untainted heart, back to where I was pure and beautiful and strong. As we silently struggle with each other’s heartstrings-with you wanting to continue to disappear and fade into the backdrop of your heart, I knew I have lost you. I knew the “frivolity of the night” had won. © 2015 Lovisa Fung. All Rights Reserved. |
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